Whore As Therapist

So I also look at ads seeking adult services, especially when things are slow. The other day I was doing that when I came across an ad seeking fantasy/fetish help. The ad John* wrote was rather vague, not sure really what he wants. It was also gender neutral. So I fired off an email, explaing that my partner, myself or both of us would be happy to do what we can to help out.

This morning found his response in my inbox. I'm not going to publish the email, to do so would be a breech of my promised discretion, but I am going to talk a bit about it. John is a bit confused. He has a great many atypical sexual/emotional desires (fetishes) that he is not really sure about. And he seems to be rather desperate to figure it all out.

Now I am not going to romanticize what I do and claim that it is often more than just helping clients get off. I'm a whore and that is the primary function of whoring. But I do occasionally pick up clients who need something more from the relationship. I have a couple of regulars who feel that it is cheaper and more effective than seeing a psychotherapist. And then I get clients like the one who inspired this post - he would be my second such.

Human sexuality is remarkably intertwined with nearly every aspect of our lives, whether we are conscious of it or not. Sometimes this is manifest rather strongly in our sexual desires, or what we perceive as sexual desires. Unfortunately, such manifestations can easily become malignant, become expressed in unhealthy, dangerous or exploitative outlets. All too often these feelings are very confusing and cause an individual to devalue themselves, feel that they are somehow a bad person because of them. From there it becomes very easy for that person to find negative outlets.

For a great many reasons, aside from his finding negative outlets, I really want to help this person. No matter what else, John is hurting and confused. He is also vulnerable, because he is afraid of being a freak, of being exposed for the freak he is increasingly convinced that he is.

Let me assure you all, he is not a freak. Some of his fetishes are very atypical, some of them would just make most folks kind of shake their heads. But combined, they make for a very interesting person, unique and beautiful for all of his interests. He has a rich and diverse world to explore that just doesn't exist for most people. He is also strong enough to reach out for help, to sort it all out. I have yet to meet with John, it's possible that I never will. We have only exchanged a couple of emails and quite often folks who have fetishes such as his have a hard time actually getting together with someone else to talk and/or act upon it.

* I will never provide the actual names of any of my clients. Male clients are John, female clients, Jane.